According to CBC, there are over 40 million visitors to online dating sites in the US and 7 million in Canada. Although these numbers may seem staggering, there are millions of other still who are hesitant to delve into the world of dating online. Why is this? What are the real risks of online dating? How can you keep yourself safe on and offline?
The first, and one of the most important rules is to never reveal any personal information, especially on a public profile where anyone with the internet can access it. Personal information of this nature includes real names, addresses, phone numbers, and any other sensitive information, especially banking or financial information. Contact information, like phone numbers and addresses should only be given to people once a certain level of trust and regular communication has been established. When dating online, protecting sensitive personal information that others can use to get access to money, personal files, and so on, can help protect your finances, and personal safety.
Meeting people from online dating sites face to face is also often perceived as quite risky. While there certainly are risks involved with meeting new people, certain safety precautions can, and should, be taken. For example, always meet in a public place, and keep a cell phone with you at all times. Tell a friend where you’re going, and who with. It’s also a good idea to designate a check in time, where you’ll call a friend to tell them where you are and how things are going, and let them know you’re safe.
Many people who stay away from dating online do so because of the perceived risks of meeting strangers over the internet. Though there certainly are risks to online dating, proper safety precautions and awareness of risks and strategies can help minimize these risks and make dating online a safe and enjoyable experience.
A Beginners Guide To Online Dating – 5 Great Tips!
Did you know that two out of five single people in the UK now use some kind of on line dating service? That’s 40% of all singles! Unfortunately, the percentage of these people who actually find a real romance as a direct result of their site memberships is very low – probably less than 10%.
Why is this? Well, it’s true that some sites are better than others; they have more traffic, they are better to navigate; they just ‘work’ whilst others just don’t. But what really matters is how you use a site when you actually sign-up to one. Take my word for it, unless you take the five simple steps that I’m about to outline, you may as well do something more productive with your time than join a singles site. What I’m about to say may sound obvious and rather simplistic, but you’d be surprised at how many people don’t bother doing the ‘obvious’. So here goes…
1. Create A Great Profile. This is the most important aspect of your dating site experience. Don’t just say ‘Nice guy seeks nice girl for trips to the cinema’ – how boring does that sound? Take the time to say something about yourself, your lifestyle, your interests and the type of person you’re hoping to meet. And remember to sound happy, upbeat, fun and confident; if you’re miserable about your recent breakup, then keep it to yourself! This isn’t the time for modesty; if you think you’re pretty darn attractive, then be sure to say so. And humour is a real ice-breaker – if you can make someone laugh, they’ll be more likely to want to contact you.
2. Always Upload A Photo. Even if you don’t have a very flattering one to hand, you should always post a pic with your profile. Remember, 95% of people on dating sites only search for other members who have bothered to provide a picture of themselves. You want to see what other potential partners look like so it stands to reason that other people will want to know what you look like too. If your photo isn’t recent or isn’t a great likeness of you, you can always say so in your profile.
3. Be Proactive. Don’t just join a site and expect other people to contact you. Make sure you regularly search the database for people with whom you might be compatible and when you find someone you like the look or sound of, write to them immediately and tell them why you think you might be a good fit.
4. Write Great Emails. OK, you’ve joined a dating site, you’ve searched for other members who fall within your specified categories, and you’ve been presented with a page of matching profiles. You’re eager to fire off a few emails…but what on earth do you say in them? Re-read the paragraph above about creating a great profile and apply the same rules to the first email that you send to another member. If it looks like you can’t be bothered to say much or that you’re sending the same one line message to several people, then they probably wont bother to reply. Tell that person a little about who you are and why you think you might both be compatible – respond directly to what you’ve read in that person’s profile – sound interested and interesting and you’ll get an email by return – sound boring and downbeat and you’ll just be ignored.
5. Check Back With The Site. There are two reasons why you should do this as often as possible. The most obvious one is to keep up to speed with who has joined since you last logged-on; that special someone might have signed-up since you last visited the site so don’t miss out. However, what most people don’t realise is that when you log-in to a dating site, your profile moves up the listings on the internal search engine which means that you are more likely to be spotted and subsequently contacted by other people. Don’t be a stranger to the site you’ve joined and I recommend that you visit the site at least once a day during the lifetime of your membership.
So there you have it – 5 easy ways to make your chosen dating site work for YOU. Have fun and happy hunting!
Internet Dating Safety Tips
Anyone who has ever heard of the Internet, whether they have used an Internet dating service or not, is well aware of some of the dangers that dating over the World Wide Web can pose. The fact is, if you Internet dating can actually be a more rewarding experience than dating out in the “real world”, and you may even be more insulated from a negative experience on the Internet that you would be in a face to face situation. The Internet offers several screening experiences that are simply not possible when dating face-to-face, and using these opportunities to your advantage can result in an extremely successful online dating experience.
In order to remain safe on the online dating site, start off your experience with each prospective date with caution. I recommend a step-by-step elevation process. Begin your search through the use of a screen name that others will address you as when they wish to contact you. Progressing to first names is not too big a step, but giving out your last name certainly is- do not do it until you have spent a reasonable amount of time talking to the other person and have a feel for the kind of person they are. Set up a separate email account for communicating with potential dates, and never give out any personal information on the first communications. If you feel the other person is pressing you for this information, be prepared to stop communication (if they are pressuring you on something like this already, the odds are good that you will face further pressures if you establish a relationship anyway).
Pay a lot of attention to what the other person is saying, and make sure to register any comments they make that are suspicious or contradictory as you talk. Don’t rush into anything- you don’t have to meet until you are both comfortable. As you chat, you will both need to establish a direct and forthright rapport with each other, in order to establish the trust which is necessary for a face-to-face meeting (this is one of the unique aspects of Internet dating- the foundation of trust is already there before you have even really met, therefore if it all seems to be working out you are several steps ahead of where you would be if you had met in the flesh initially).
Some hard evidence is always good to establish some trust and a deepening of the relationship. Request a photo, and be prepared to reciprocate. It can be daunting to send that photo, but if the goal is to meet eventually then you are going to see each other sooner or later anyway.
Finally, when it comes time to meet, make sure it is in a highly visible area, with many other people around. Don’t be too private on the first date- dinner at a restaurant, a movie in a theater- something with plenty of other people around as you get to really know the person.
Internet dating is growing in popularity and can be a great way to find and establish a great relationship. The mantra “there are a lot of weirdos out there” certainly rings true, but the simple fact is that this is also true in “real” life. Exercising some additional caution in Internet dating will ensure that you have safe experiences, although just like in real life they may not always bear fruit.